Assuming you even make it past the dreaded ‘talking stage’, there’s then the very real risk of being ghosted or stood up.
After wasting hours of time getting ready and hundreds of dollars on make-up and new outfits, one woman has decided to make a stand.
The frustrated dater has suggested men should pay a ‘first date deposit’, after numerous failed meets from dating apps.
30-year-old Maddy Carty has come up with the controversial proposal to try and stop men from ditching at the last minute.
Maddy Carty has angered men with her suggestion that they pay a deposit to date (instagram/maddycarty)
Talking on the Mads World podcast, she said: “If someone cancels a date within 24 hours, you should be able to charge a cancellation fee.”
Needless to say, her idea has upset people.
“And they wonder why relationships fail, great start indeed,” wrote one man on TikTok.
Others made it a bit more personal, sniping: “If you want to know why blokes are cancelling on you, then just re-watch your own TikTok. If we wanted the drama and the pageantry, we’d all just head to the Miss World contest.”
“Charging for a woman’s time…Novel,” added another man.
Unphazed, the content creator doubled down on her suggestion to the Daily Mail: “I said what I said, and I stand by it.”
Maddy has said she wastes hours of time and a lot of money on cancelled dates (instagram/maddycarty)
She recalled talking to a man online for a few weeks, before he frustratingly stood her up with less than half-an-hour’s notice.
“We’d locked in a time and place for Friday night, I tanned the night before. I went into work that day when I could have worked from home. I did my make up. I styled my hair. I dressed up. I had a pre-drink with my workmates at the bar… and then got a text half an hour before we were meant to meet up,” she fumed.
“It said: ‘Oh sorry, I’ve got to work late, I can’t make it anymore.'”
Apparently it’s an all-too-common occurrence nowadays
“It probably happens one out of two times. So many times… they love to talk the talk, but they won’t walk the walk.”
She likened the experience of using dating apps to keeping a toy pet alive: “It’s like having all these pen pals, like little Tamagotchi pets in my phone that I have to feed, and talk to them all so they don’t die.”
She insists the fee is more than fair to pay her back for lost time and money she spent on getting ready, but says it doesn’t make up for it fully: “You can’t get back the time you invest in getting ready, getting excited.”
The fact it was also a Friday night when he cancelled annoyed her: “I also then couldn’t do anything else on that day. Friday night is prime real estate of the week. By 6pm, it’s too late to organise another date, or for me to make other plans with friends.”
“I had to go home, get un-ready and sit on my couch watching Netflix. It’s a huge waste of time and effort.”
She says it’s just disrespectful: “I’m someone who sticks to plans once I make them, out of respect for the other person. If you wouldn’t cancel on your friend last minute, then what makes you think cancelling on someone you’ve been talking to online is okay?”
Do you think the fee is fair?
